Reaching...

One of the things that I like to do as part of our family tasks is going to the grocery store. I don't know why, but it works. I don't mind pushing the buggy down the aisles in search of the things we need, and on occasion, things we don't. My wife doesn't seem to mind that it's a part of enjoy, like mowing the lawn, keeping the garage organized, and a few other things. The system works, and if it ain't broke, don't mess with it.

On a recent trip to the market I was on my usual path strolling through each aisle finding the necessary items that I was there to obtain when I noticed a woman trying to reach a jar of tomato sauce that was on the top shelf. We were the only two people in the same section at the moment and as I watched her strain to reach the jar, I did what came naturally to me. I walked to the lady and asked, "May I get that for you Ma'am?"

It was a polite gesture, so I thought. Something I was brought up to do, just like holding the door open for others and waiting for people to depart an elevator before charging in to claim my spot. But I apparently was wrong in my assumption at this particular junction.

Without looking at me the woman said simply and gruffly, "No!"

I must admit I was shocked. A simple offer for a simple problem with a simple solution in my opinion was obviously going to help this lady unknown to me at the time. I paused for a moment, somewhat in disbelief. I watched as she continued her quest for the jar with the thought that she may be at this for a while. She was riding one of the motorized shopping carts that are in so many stores these days and had precariously and cautiously stepped from her cart and was reaching as high as she could, and she was nowhere close to getting what she wanted.

I walked back to my grocery shopping still watching out of the corner of my eye, hoping she wouldn't fall. She turned, holding on to one of the handlebars of the scooter and turned to get a cane that she had stashed in the basket with her other items and slowly turned around with her new implement for jar procurement. She tried to stand tall, as if on her tip-toes, but it would've been impossible as I noticed her thick ankles and short stooped heavy body wave her cane precariously at her object of desire. In her attempt she pushed the jar further back on the shelf.

Once again I approached this woman and said, "Ma'am, please let me get that for you."

This time she looked at me. Silently. It was a look sharper than a warriors sword that was a combination of, "Go to hell," and, "Didn't you hear me the first time?" I knew it was fueled by knowing that there was a day, a time in her life when that jar would have been easily retrieved. Once upon a time no struggle would've been necessary to do a simple task. To her this was a quest, to me it was a jar out of reach.

With my final request denied I started on my way further down the aisle when I heard what I thought would be the inevitable. A crash behind me was the sound of several jars hitting the tile floor and shattering, splashing their contents. I was then that I realized there was only one way to help the situation. I noticed an employee was on the way to clean up the mess that splattered in all directions. At that moment I knew she was distracted by embarrassment as she attempted to clean the mess from her own pants. I walked quietly behind her, grabbed the single jar from the top shelf and put it on a lower shelf and hurried to the next aisle to finish my trip.

Our paths crossed only once more during my trip to the store, we passed silently as if we had never seen one another, but I looked carefully, and there in her basket was the jar that she could reach even while sitting in her cart. My job was done. I may have annoyed or perhaps even angered this woman I didn't know. I had no complete or partial understanding of her unwillingness to accept help for something simple. I only knew that I could help solve her dilemma quietly and go on my merry way.

Perhaps it's the years of preaching and writing that cause me to look at ordinary events and see them in different contexts. I tend to dwell on useless experiences and trivial events, but often in the contemplation I learn something about myself, about others, and about God. Such was the case with this unknown gruff and unpleasant woman. In my observation of her reaching for the elusive jar, without receiving help for to get an object set too high, she made a mess.

Such is the case in life. Many set the bar too high and lofty to obtain creating frustration, despair, and for some failure. In our American ideal of determination and pulling ourselves up by our own bootstraps this self-sufficiency often becomes a wall between ourselves and God. We live in a culture that celebrates achievers who surpass the idea of what is above average or excellent while feeling pity or disdain for those who reach for nothing. It is such an idea that fuels business professionals, outstanding athletes, celebrated scholars, and the elite band of the, "successful," that bleeds into every corner of our psyche. Some of these bars set high requiring a stretch to achieve are admirable, others normal or benign, and still others heinous. However, everyone has the idea of reaching his goal, the prize. From the wealthiest executive on Wall Street to the unkempt, foul smelling man trying to get enough money for his next hit or a 40 ounce bottle wrapped in a paper bag.

We all reach, sometimes with great frustration. Think of the infant reaching for her mother, arms outstretched wanting to be held, and the detrimental effects of that baby who has no one to reach back and hold her to a loving chest. We learn to stretch while learning reading, writing, and arithmatic. For far too many the idea of sink or swim has crept into the deepest recesses of being.

In our relationship with God we often reach. C.S. Lewis wrote of his early life before renouncing his faith in the dark times of atheism, that he would write lists on scraps of paper of his behavior to be the Christian boy he thought was required. Many feel so far from God because they see themselves as the one who can't reach the standard needed to be Godly. while others still renounce any desire to follow the risen Christ as fallacy, but still in my experience each of those too are reaching for something, anything, like the crying infant in the night, arms outstretched hoping for that which gives fulfillment, contentment, and ultimately love.

We can learn much about the love of our God by reading the end of the gospel of John. Following his resurrection, Jesus had a sea side conversation with a wounded and shame filled Peter. Peter, his follower, who promised he would never abandon his teacher and leader Jesus, had denied knowing him three times during the most excruciating hours of his earthly life. Peter, to save his own neck, emphatically publicly declared while warming himself by a fire that he did not even know Jesus. His denial was repeated three times. When telling Jesus that he would even die for him, Peter set the bar high, and like all of us fell short, far short of keeping his word. He failed like an athlete tripping at the starting line of the race. Like many falls, pain follows. A broken warrior for the cause of Jesus retreated to resume his fishing career.

After a fruitless night of fishing, Peter and six of his fellow disciples, probably frustrated and tired caught sight of an unrecognizable man on the shore in the early morning asking them:

"Friends, haven't you any fish?" called the onlooker (John 21:5)

Their answer was a simple, "No."

After receiving their instruction to throw their nets on the others side of the boat the failed fishing trip turned into a catch of 153 fish. After reaching the shore realizing the man was Jesus (during his third appearance to his disciples after he was raised from the dead) the disciples saw that he had a fire and there were fish cooking on the burning coals along with some bread. Jesus invited the men to bring some of the fish from their amazing harvest to add to those already cooking reminding us that Jesus didn't need their fish, he allowed them to add their efforts, that were guided by Jesus' call to them. Their obedience to Jesus' word allowed them to the miraculous catch. When we combine our efforts with obedience to Jesus' following he allows us to help in the work of our Father's Kingdom.

The group sat down to breakfast. Surely eager to see their rabbi, the resurrected Savior, one can only imagine the conversation during the meal. When everyone had finished eating Jesus asked Peter a direct question:

"Simon, son of John, do you truly love me more than these?"

Simon Peter answered affirmatively and was given the command to feed his lambs. Letting others know of this Risen Christ and his amazing love that fills the soul to the full.

Jesus then asked the same question. Peter gave the same answer, that of course he loved Jesus. Again Jesus told him to take care of his sheep. Peter had twice been asked the question of love, and twice been given the command to continue the work of letting all know about his unfailing, never-ending, and unconditional love.

It was the third question that Jesus asks that hurts Peter when once more from the Lord's mouth he hears, "Do you love me?" Three times Peter had pretended that he did not know Jesus in the moments he needed the most support. Three times he emphatically said, "No," when he was recognized as one of the men who had been a follower of the condemned yet guiltless man. And now, three times Jesus allows Peter to tell him he loves him. Not once, nor twice, but three times Jesus asked the question. But it is the third question that tells us of yet another time that God stooped low to allow the fallen humankind to reach his loving arms.

You see, the first two times Jesus asked Peter if he loved him, Jesus used the word translated from Greek as, "love." But this type of love, "agape," is the perfect love. Unconditional, freely given, covenant love that can only be demonstrated perfectly by God Himself. Perhaps in human terms, the love of a parent to a child can become the closest type of this love that can be demonstrated on this side of Glory.

The third and last time Jesus asked Peter about his love, he used a different word for love, translated from the Greek word "phileo," that is a brotherly love. This is a more attainable type of love in our human condition in which we struggle, stumble, and often fall attempting to love others as ourselves. In essence, Jesus lowered the bar for Peter. Jesus knew Peter would still struggle, stumble, and err in his attempts to care for the flock of Jesus' followers. Jesus put love within Peter's reach.

In the same way, Jesus has given us perfect, free, unconditional, unfailing, and never-ending love knowing we cannot love him nearly as much as He loves us. Calling us to love others with our best efforts, knowing that even when we stumble, struggle, and fall in our attempts, Jesus is there to help us know what it is for which we reach. When we attempt to fill our needs alone, we often cause the inevitable crash causing the messy splatters of life to drag us through the darkest of darkness.

So when we reach, we who profess Jesus as our loving Lord and Savior must not be like the woman relentlessly trying to do for herself what someone else was willing to do. God put his love low enough for us to reach out and take hold wherever we are. God showed his love on the blood splattered and splintered cross of His one and only Son.

As his children, when we reach out and cry to him in our deepest of valleys, and the torments of waves of dread. Our ever loving God reaches back and holds us close to his chest just as a loving Father would.